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My long lost entry has fled my mind leaving behind a haze of dissolusionment and sorrow, or maybe that was something else. Perhaps I wlil ressurect it tomorrow if I have a free moment.
Veritably Heavy Shit going on right now, in all aspects of my life. I'm feeling my will (sanity?) begin to fray again, which is a very frightening thing. These feelings will probably be quickly swept out of the main current of my thoughts to some conveniently quiet pool, due to my chemically reprogrammed brain (damn you paxil). My brain cries for complacency and order, yet my soul/heart/irrationality cries out for chaos, pain, and change. The latter voice has been all but shut out these days, a bad thing.
There they go, off to an out of the way pool, to be forgotten. By morning this will all seem like random, meaningless ravings. Why must all of my strong actions be so intensly negative? Sigh. No need for concern, gentle (or not so) reader, I will undoubtably return to my normal, low-energy state quite soon.
Also, livejournal has been slow all day, god-dammit.
Veritably Heavy Shit going on right now, in all aspects of my life. I'm feeling my will (sanity?) begin to fray again, which is a very frightening thing. These feelings will probably be quickly swept out of the main current of my thoughts to some conveniently quiet pool, due to my chemically reprogrammed brain (damn you paxil). My brain cries for complacency and order, yet my soul/heart/irrationality cries out for chaos, pain, and change. The latter voice has been all but shut out these days, a bad thing.
There they go, off to an out of the way pool, to be forgotten. By morning this will all seem like random, meaningless ravings. Why must all of my strong actions be so intensly negative? Sigh. No need for concern, gentle (or not so) reader, I will undoubtably return to my normal, low-energy state quite soon.
Also, livejournal has been slow all day, god-dammit.
